For many people, love is the most important feeling in their lives. However, finding and expressing that love isn’t always easy. This is especially true when the person you care about isn’t reciprocating your feelings, or worse yet, is ignoring them altogether. This is why it’s so important to communicate clearly in the moments when you feel that love.
Unfortunately, many people aren’t even aware that their actions are sending the wrong message. They may think that by saying “I love you” over and over again, they’re proving that their feelings are legitimate. While it is important to say these words, it’s also just as vital to show your spouse that you love them by how you behave. For example, if you’re always texting them and talking over FaceTime, it’s likely that your relationship is in danger of turning into a gray area where no one knows what the future holds.
Ultimately, a healthy love requires a lot of commitment and sacrifice. Whether it’s dropping your plans for a sun-drenched vacation to be by your sick parent’s bedside or putting off that new home improvement project so you can be there to hold their hand as they’re getting chemotherapy, true love is not easy. It’s a process that crawls into the dungeons of reality with you–building connection, presence, and trust over time.
That’s why it can be hard to know when you’re in love with someone. Sometimes the mushy-gushy romantic feelings that make you want to jump up and down in your seat are just a temporary hormonal rush. But if you can see beyond that, you may find yourself in a deep and abiding love.
If you’re not sure, take our love quiz to learn more about your relationship. The results will help you decide if what you’re experiencing is the real deal or just infatuation.
Some people are cautious about claiming their feelings, because if they get rejected, they might lose those feelings. It’s understandable, but it’s not healthy. Saying “I love you” can be a powerful and affirming gesture, so don’t hide it away. It’s worth it in the long run!
But you should never use “I love you” as a way to check off a list of milestones. Instead, make it a regular part of your communication and try to incorporate it into your daily life. Make your partner a priority, and do little things throughout the day to make them smile. Those are the little things that add up to a big impact. And it’s always better to show your love through actions than just words.