If you’re in a committed relationship, chances are, the word love can mean a lot of different things to you. It may include the way you care for your partner, the intimacy you share, or your shared values and goals. It might also mean the way you protect them or how you go out of your way to make them happy. But what exactly is love, and how do you know if you’re in it?
Researchers, psychologists, and sociologists all have some disagreements on how to define the word “love.” Some say it’s a basic human emotion like happiness or anger. Others say it’s not an emotion at all, but rather an essential physiological drive. And still others say that love is a combination of emotions, including lust, attraction, affection, and trust.
It’s not just the complexity of the feelings involved that makes it difficult to understand, though. Some of the reasons it’s hard to explain are cultural or generational. For instance, it’s common to hear men and women talk about love differently. And while gender doesn’t play an important role in how you show love, it can influence what type of love you feel.
What’s more, there’s a difference between loving someone and saying you love them. The former is an emotional experience that varies, while the latter is a choice you can make at any time. It’s also not the same as having a crush, which is often described as an intense feeling of desire and arousal. In contrast, true love is a deeper commitment to someone, regardless of how you’re feeling at any given moment.
In many ways, real love is harder than falling in love because it doesn’t always feel very good. It involves the work of overcoming obstacles in your relationships, such as communication problems or insecurities. It requires being there for your partner when they’re struggling or having a bad day, even if you don’t always feel like it. It means making sacrifices, such as going to early morning doctor’s appointments or cleaning up bodily fluids.
Ultimately, though, it’s worth the effort. It’s the kind of love that can transcend adversity and endure. It can survive anger, pain and grief. It can exist in the most unlikely of places and times. It can even be unrequited. And it’s a love worthy of being celebrated.
So this Valentine’s Day, remember to love yourself and your partner by showing them how you really feel. Say it out loud, show them, and make sure that the words you speak and the actions you take are genuine. And if you’re lucky enough to have found true love, cherish it, because it’s rarer than you might think.
