As humans, we’re constantly seeking what makes us happy. A few things are consistently seen as the most important to our overall happiness: close relationships, a job or past time that we love and helping others. Regardless of where we live or what our lifestyles may be, these are the elements that the majority of people value most in their lives.
In a relationship, it is not uncommon to want to declare love to your partner. However, you should not rush this and should wait until you feel that it is the right time for both of you. Ideally, this will be after you have spent some time getting to know them and they have experienced your affection for them.
Generally speaking, men tend to be more likely to say they love their partners first, while women will often let the relationship mature before they express their feelings. But there are exceptions to the rule, and every couple is different.
One common reason that someone might not say “I love you” for a while is that they’re afraid of the commitment involved. They may be nervous about how you’ll react, and they might assume that if they’re not the first to say it, then it isn’t real. They may also be unsure of their feelings and need time to process the idea.
Other reasons include feeling that they’ve already said it to you in some other way and that this would be redundant. They might think that the phrase is used too lightly in modern culture and that it’s not appropriate in a serious relationship. Lastly, they may be worried that you’ll reject them or find another partner and they don’t want to risk hurting your feelings.
The key to determining if you’re ready to say it is in reading your partner’s cues and evaluating your emotions. If you’re feeling excited about your partner and you’re able to visualize yourself spending the rest of your life with them, then it’s probably a good idea to go for it.
When you do decide to say it, remember that it’s best said in a meaningful way. Write it in a letter or card, shout it across a soccer field, or give it to them while you’re holding hands. Whatever you choose, it should be a special moment and should be something that you both will remember. According to Kory Floyd, an Arizona State University professor who has studied the benefits of expressing positive feelings toward others, telling your loved ones that you care about them can lower stress hormones, reduce cholesterol and support a stronger immune system. So don’t hold back – tell them how much you love them! And don’t worry if they don’t immediately reciprocate your feelings; that’s just part of the learning experience. Love is a complicated emotion, and it’s up to you to figure out how to make it work for you and your partner. Good luck!